Haha, if there is anyone over here at all. Hello~

Why argh? I keep asking myself over the weekends. Really why?! I don't get it.

Come here is the problem, lets call this lady L, short and sweet. I mean the name, you must be thinking that I was talking about her right? See what I did there, uh uh o.O

So here comes the question, or maybe some led in before I ask the question. Okay I admit, I think I don't like/ have any feeling toward her anymore, she is supposed to be dead to me. Right?! Majority of my friends keep telling me she is not worth it. Yeap, and its been like maybe one year since I swore I will heck care about her.

HERE IS THE QUESTION. WHY THE FUCK IS SHE STILL AFFECTING MY LIFE!!!???

Current date, 051011. I have to hide L's facebook profile before I can really ignore her. Even so, once every months I will type her name into the search bar and check her page just to see how she is... Why? Why is anything of her life still affecting me? I lied on sentosa beach, staring at the dark sea for like an hours just running the word 'why' over and over again. I also want to move on, really like, really really bad!

I came out with quite a few of possibility. Come lets analyse (Actually if no one visit my blog...)

a) I was waiting for something in return. As in I personally think that I had really put in alot of effort... So can just end everything like that, abit unfair for me leh.

b) I am actually still hopeful that we will get together someday.

c) I am not meeting any female lately so kinda like stuck with her, I mean to think about la.

a, b, c... Which one? Or maybe all three? Then again, I started to think about, what will happened if we really got together? Am I just liking her because she is hard to get? I doubt we have much common interest (maybe have but I won't know also), and I doubt we really know about each others life anymore...

FUCK LA, all in all... I am just in love with the idea of being in love... That frame of time where I really thought this is it... I honestly thinks she no longer the girl I see, but every time I look at her photo I see that girl... I need to really get out of this. 1800-love-doctor help la.

Okay, to make me feel better... She is still single! Not that I feel that I still have a shot at it, but more of like, she has issues so thats why I can't seems to impress her. Used to be a nice guy... How I miss myself, the one before this shit.

Now I seriously... (let me find that thing in tumblr)

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT, I NEVER REBLOG IT!!?

"I am comfortably numb."

Just need to overcome that! And splitting platoon with Felix!!! NOOOOOO~